i wish i could remember the good things about you but the day you went and the ones that have followed are so vivid in my mind,missing you dont even touch the pain and heartache of you not being here,i cant do xmas i havent even put my decorations up and i know anna wouldnt have either but shes doing it for the kids just like you did it for us,how the hell you carried on mum with losing your mother and a husband that beat the hell out of you all the time and plus 4 kids to raise i will never know,see you are an amazing mother you went on for us,i remember you didnt want togo on without nannie just as i hate going on without you,holding your love inside us is just about keeping us going,you were our light you showed us the way through good and bad,but now your not here to hold us when we cry,to tell us everythings gonna be ok its hurting so bad i love you so much and miss you more than anything always will my perfect amazing mum xxxxkezzyxxxx